I have been in the phase of my life which I am calling my problem definition and then actively searching for solutions for the identified problem phase. I have decided to just stop being so damned lazy and actually have a definitive plan of action with a to do list to fight my natural procrastination. Because to tell you the truth I have become a little sick of myself - at being ungrateful, complaining and generally miserable with my decisions and lack of action. So one day I woke up and decided enough is enough I have a damn good life, lovely kids albeit a handful, good health and home life so the only thing standing in the way for my developing myself was me... it wouldn't do to feel bad for not doing something or not working or having a career, wasting my education, yelling at my incredibly strong willed daughter.
So the first thing on my to-do list is th take a small step and try not to yell for one week, I came across this blog,
www.theorangerhino.com, in which this mom of 4 boys took a one year no-yell challenge and actually did it. Amongst my to-do list is of course
* no yelling for 1 week [i am not brave enough to say one year]
* Spend an hour a day on my blog
* Spend an hour a day on my looooong over-due dissertation which i am ashamed to say i still haven't completed
I have been thinking about whether I am chronically lazy or afraid of being a failure one sure way of not failing is not doing correct? But this not doing has created a lot of anger inside of me - and testament to my absolute commitment for this change is I am actually going to attend an anger management workshop [yikes] but trying new things means you are making an effort to bring about change...
Fingers Crossed!!! But I know as long as I stop intending to, and just do it, there will be results that follow. Intentions really pave the way to inaction!!!
