Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Encounter Of A 'Strange' Kind

Hell hath no fury... and boy did I truly appreciate the veracity of this very apt saying.

My husband and I had gone for a barbecue to a friend's house. It was a very pleasant evening, sitting outside in his garden, enjoying the beautiful weather. Met a lot of new people, a couple of South African gentlemen, some other couples, a woman who had been in the Olympics she used to play badminton professionally for seven years. I can't recall where she was from I think Russia or Poland or somewhere. She was cool.

So this woman who this story is about [not the Olympiad] but a seriously insane gal, was the host's current girlfriend or love interest I don't know which. It was the first time I was meeting her. When we entered she was dancing away a little drunk. Well we got the hello, hi and other pleasantries out of the way and then my hubby and I went and sat outside. She stayed inside... dancing to her own crazy tune.

After a delicious dinner, guitars were brought out and someone started singing. It was a lovely summer breeze and the ambiance was just right, people who hadn't met before gelling together because of good music and good wine and just the spirit to make it a nice evening. At one point she came out, gave us all a pointed stare then went inside and turned the music full blast [she really did have no manners or social graces] anyway the jam session outside had to end. But I think we were enjoying it so much that some brave soul ventured in and switched off the music [Aside: I think this must have been the point that she lost the few marbles she had left in her brain]. Up till now the unhinging of the 'crazy' one was silent. Silent but deadly.

People started singing outside again. She came out for a brief drunken interlude to say that she didn't like the singing coz she wanted to dance that we all were boring old farts [not in the same exact words but that was the gist]. Later on our host joined us as we sung Simon and Garfunkel songs.

This incident, I'm talking about happened when I had to go the ladies room. I went to a room where I had gone earlier as I was not too familiar with the house, it was only my second visit there, and the other bathroom was occupied. The room was dark and the door slightly ajar, so I went in. At this point I didn't know that there was someone else in the room then I saw a figure lying on the bed, I apologized politely and started to back out when I saw the figure lift its head.

It was then this woman sprang out of bed and literally lunged after me screaming obscenities. She starts shouting and accusing me, saying stuff like, 'just because i was sleeping with her boyfriend/our host [whom by the way I'd met twice in my life] it didn't give me the right to enter the room and switch on the lights [which I hadn't done as I had not gone in far enough to even get to the light], who did i think I was etc etc.

Really taken aback, I tell her she's mistaken, I'm very happily married, here with my husband and all I wanted to do was use the bathroom, really urgently, but nothing had any effect on her it was as if she were waiting to pounce on me as soon as she got the opportunity.

There I'm standing shocked out of my skull, wanting desperately to go to the loo and this shrieking banshee is coming at my throat.

It shames me to say it but I ran out, I didn't want to create a scene at some one's house, someone that I didn't even know that well, who was my husbands' new friend or fall to her obviously low standards. As luck would have it, it was hubby that was in the other loo. I pounded on the door and told him to either come out or let me in because by this time I seriously wanted to punch her out.

The banshee followed me, my hubby came out and told her to bloody well stop screaming at me but she wouldn't, she kept saying such horribly ugly stuff. By this time I was in tears I know that sounds wimpy but it's terrible to have someone screaming at you, I have never had anyone treating me with such animosity or disrespect or assassinating my character like this. I think I was crying with rage.

My hubby told the host to control his girl. I have never seen him so angry, if he wasn't such a gentleman he would seriously have slapped her. Now the host is, one of the nicest people I've met since we moved here, very hospitable and polite and well mannered. So he was mortified.

I came out in the garden she continued her screaming inside now at him, I wanted to go back inside now that the initial shock had subsided, and let her have a piece of mind, but my husband and the other guests told me to let it go and ignore her as she had been having temper tantrums on and off the whole evening from even before we got here. Anyway we sat for a while and then left with our host profusely apologetic. I wished I had slapped the bitch!

The funny thing is that to this date, I don't understand what pushed her over the edge, why she turned on me at all, why she said what she did and what led to the entire twisted thought process. I hardly had any contact with her as I was outside the whole evening.

Do women get so jealous of any other passably good looking woman who is treated with respect and regard? And she was a really attractive looking woman herself so why would she suffer from low self esteem and act so weird.

I guess self esteem and self respect have got nothing to do with looks or maybe too much alcohol just ain't good for ya!

I have had only two such intense confrontations, this one that happened almost two years ago and another fairly recently, but boy, women are so much scarier then men!!!

We are now pretty friendly with the aforementioned host minus the psycho. We were talking about it today and laughing away, so I thought I'd share my encounter of the third kind!!!


Blur Ting said...

Oh wow, what an encounter! I would be mortified too. The worst thing is, it's really beyond your control and you feel so helpless and victimised. She reminds me of the 'black spidey suit' in Spiderman 3, doesn't it? Just that in this case, the poison is alcohol.

Anonymous said...

Gosh, I'm a bit breathless from this post. I know it may seem exagerated but some parts (specially the one where you said you were already in tears of rage and she'd continue screaming) reminded me of a horrible experience (probably the worst in my life) I lived just a couple of months ago. However, in that case, it wasn't because of alcohol or no-reason-at-all-madness, but still, it's terrible to be in that position where you feel so helpless and full of anger. I know, I too wanted to slap someone when that happened but nowadays I'm glad I didn't, cause it's just going down to their level and probably feeling bad afterwards anyway.

On a less serious tone, I quote ya:

"Do women get so jealous of any other passably good looking woman who is treated with respect and regard?"


Lol, really, thanks for sharing your experiences with such honesty and sincerity, Random, it's really nice reading them.

Random Magus said...

Blur ting: I love the analogy - I think thats whats I'll call her now Black Spidey

Wonder: Now because time's passed I can laugh about it, but at that time it was so terrible to hear such hatred and rage directed towards you. We had just moved and were making friends and I'd had had a terrible accident just six months prior breaking 5 bones - and then this sort of public was just a nightmare of a year

HollyGL said...

I will definitely concur that it doesn't matter if a woman is WAY prettier than you. If you have healthy self-eteem, and she doesn't, she'll sense it and come after you one way or another. I'm sorry to say that I, too, have experienced it. Both overtly - as you did - and much more subtley.

I've always believed that women should support each other as much as possible. Unfortunately, its all too often competition rather than comradery.

Chin up! There are plenty of us out here who would celebrate all that's great about you!

Random Magus said...

It's sad that more often than not a woman is another woman's worse enemy. I think that by putting someone else down some people think they can elevate themselves.
Its sad and pathetic but you are right it probably comes from real low self esteem!